Worthiness
by paynesgrey
Summary: Sometimes he thinks he isn't worthy of her. Rosalee x Monroe. One-shot.


AN: Written for the "simply" prompt for the Summer Mini Challenge on Dreamwidth. This is a one-shot.

Worthiness

When they first meet, he notices a shine about her, one that she holds back, hiding from the darkness of her past. He feels something kindred in her, and sometimes he can't look away from her eyes - ones that have known hurt - a pain that has spurred her to climb up from frightening depths, biting and scratching to bring her to the surface.

They've begun as friends, and he feels selfish for wanting more. Monroe always feels selfish around Rosalee. He wants more of her time. He wants more of the slightest of their touches, the arms that brush against each other as they concoct a new remedy or cure.

The smell of her drugs him. She's earthy and wild and celestial, and when they're close, he smells the moon on her and feels the desire to hunt - as well as other desires that he's pushed deep inside his own darkness, subdued but clawing to get out.

He sees her smiling at him - _only_ him, and they get caught in a moment where he feels fuller, as if puzzle pieces start to fit in her presence. As if life makes sense when Rosalee is near. When he feels this way he wonders if he's worthy of her; he wonders if she thinks he has any worthiness at all to be with her.

When she first kisses him it's a mistake. He doesn't want to see it that way, but she's under a spell and she's not herself, and it's not how Monroe wants them to begin.

But it gives him hope. And it makes him feel worthy when he wants nothing more.

She kisses him only to leave him, but he knows she'll be back, that she'll belong to him; which only makes him want her more.

When she returns, he can have her. Frustrated, things still get in the way, mysteries and tragedies interrupt them, and he wonders if they'll ever have a moment to themselves. It aggravates him, and he feels that maybe he's been punished too long. He's given up his nature; he's stopped hunting people long ago… Shouldn't Rosalee be his reward?

He turns his feelings inward, finding his center, and he watches as Nick leaves the shop, darting off to some other police scene painted with tragedy. He turns to Rosalee and sighs, feeling a sense of reprieve at finally being alone with her with only a small sense of dread hovering over them. Whatever call took Nick away, Monroe is sure he'll be back for their help. With a lot of Wesen activity in Portland, now more than ever, he's sure they'll get involved.

Not that he will complain much, but alone time with Rosalee has been scarce lately.

"Whatcha thinking?" she asks him simply and unaffected, as if they are a normal couple and aren't out there trying to save innocents and protect their kind. She's searching for ingredients around her shop, cooking up a healing tea for one of her earlier orders.

He says nothing at first, knowing words aren't good enough. The peace and silence of her shop bears opportunity. He moves toward her, pulling her from behind into an embrace against his chest.

She makes an "oh" sound, giggles lightly and leans against him. "So there's where your thoughts are."

"It's been a long time," he says in a sheepish laugh. She "hmms" in understanding and turns into his arms, drawing her face up to his and capturing him in a kiss. He delves into her deeply, and he feels her melt against him. Her warmth envelops him, and he enjoys her taste against his lips, against his tongue. He feels his blood go hot, wanting more, taking more.

Rosalee reads his intentions and pulls him backward, toward her path winding through the store and toward a couch in the back. She pulls apart and frames his face with her hands. She smiles brightly at him and he sees that shine about her that made him notice her, even made him fall in love with her.

"Stay the night?" she whispers, and she's drawing him down over her on the couch.

He nods, almost saying he'd stay every night. She doesn't need to ask. He follows the spell of her eyes and finds her lips again. Her fingers weave through his hair and the smallest giggle against his lips fills him with a wave of heat.

With her hands on him and her laughter in his ear, the moment changes him, letting loose a wounded lonely beast trapped deep within.

Only in Rosalee can he let himself safely break; only in Rosalee does Monroe feel worthy.


End file.
